“May I Call You Sister” by Sharon Baker
A Monologue, performed by a Female named Lexi.
LEXI:
Back in high school, I was Wild. Cleopatra eyeliner, oh so tight mini skirts and pointy boobs. See? Still got em.
Truth: I was scared of….Everything. Thunder. Men. Spiders. Men. Snakes. Men. Bein’ hot or cold. Men. Rollercoasters….Men.
I didn’t see much for myself in the way of….Anything. In my family, all the females married, birthed babies, and lived quietly at home. So I married a not tooooo scary man, and prepared for my Perfect Boring Life.
Then my girlfriend Jackie took me on a little trip to the Florida Everglades. A winter getaway, escaping snow.
Hey! Everglades is real scary. Fulla snakes, gators, mosquitoes. Hunter men in camo gear hid behind trees, pointing guns at sweet faced deer. Long beards, pointy teeth, they’d come to murder for fun.
But those Men couldn’t shoot me cuz I was canoe fishing with my girlfriend Jackie. Floating through tunnels of dreamy mangroves, we sang hello! to elegant great blue herons, and trusting red–bellied turtles perched on evil looking alligators.
At sunset, vicious mosquitoes bloodied our arms while we waited for hungry Everglades fish to seize our bait. Nothin’ happened for ‘bout an hour.
Then: my line pulled tight. Really really tight.
An angry creature swam madly round and round our canoe, determined to pull it over. But I held on forever and then! Reeled in, I sincerely swear—The Most Beautiful Baby Hammerhead Shark God Ever Created.
“Jeez, Lexi,” Jackie whispered to me. “Better throw her back in. Quick. Before Mamma Hammerhead jumps in with us.”
“I gotta kiss her, Jackie.”
“You? Scaredy–cat, Lexi?” she smirked. “No telling what might happen.” Jackie knew me soooo well.
I brushed Baby Hammerhead against my cheek. Her muscled body was scratchy and velvety. I kissed her. Right between her beautiful eyes. So wild. So perfect.
“I name you Sister,” I whispered. “Sister Shark. From now on, we’re Family. I’m Wild as You.”
Well. Naming a hammerhead shark My Sister, changed Everything.
Back home, I divorced the not tooo scary man, forgot about breeding babies, and dashed out to meet Planet Earth. Jackie stayed quiet at home, birthing beautiful babies, as we knew she should.
Sister Hammerhead introduced me to my Family: Sister Polar Bear, Sister Seahorse, Sister Whale Shark, and oh so many creatures, great and small. I
became a brave globetrotting Travel Journalist, sharing my wild adventures in magazines and plays.
And I was never Afraid of Anything, Again.
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Sharon Baker Artist Statement:
I believe we all are Creative, whether it’s art, literature, design, or crafting amazing cuisine. I’m blessed to be a Renaissance lady: filmmaker, essayist, travel journalist, playwright, YouTube producer, children’s book author, and mixed media artist. Working in all these genres for 50 years keeps me inspired. And I value being in various communities with endless types of creative humans. What a Blessing is my life: I’m over the moon grateful.
Google Travel Journalist Sharon Spence Lieb, to enjoy 300+ award winning travel essays and five travel books.
On New Play Exchange, find Sharon’s bio and stage plays, under Sharon Baker.
Sharon’s wildlife paintings are in galleries and private collections.
